DAN TRIES INCREDIBLES! BAY STATE BAR
Yep. I'm back at it and reviewing another Incredibles product. What will I be scarfing down today? The Baystate Bar. Fitting, since it's a Massachusetts themed bar and I bought it in the state. I love toffee. What's better than just toffee? A bar of chocolate filled with toffee..No, a chocolate bar filled with toffee and marijuana. Yes. Now that's what I'm talking about. This bar is also not vegan, yeah I know. I know. This is the only time I consume any dairy. Usually, for my highs I eat the dark chocolate vegan bar-did I do a blog on them? I think I reviewed...? No! I mentioned them in Danny's Halloween High but didn't name the product or review or give price/quality...Oh shit, I should probably do that, shouldn't I? Yeah. Maybe sometime this week, if I can remember. I've got a lot going on this week at work and therapy.
As it is made by the same company as the Budah Bar, the design of the bar is the same. It comes in little squares each sectioned into little triangles. Now, I love this. It reminds me of being a kid and having my nan make me grilled cheese; she'd always cut them into little triangles for me. Godamn, I miss this. And shit, it's been a while since I had a grilled cheese. I should make one, one of these days. Fuck, I'm getting off-topic here.
The chocolate doesn't have the funny aftertaste like the last one; probably because it's not a white chocolate. I've said it before and I'll say it again, fuck white chocolate. The chocolate has only the faintest hint of marijuana taste; it's so smooth and the toffee has the perfect amount of crunch. It's some of the tastiest toffees I've had in a while. I wonder how long it will take to get me high. I felt like I kinda needed a bit more to feel what I wanted to when I had the Buddha, but let's take it slow, yeah? I want to enjoy the high, not reach a level of paranoia like I did the other week. Should I do a blog on that one too? The Aliens Say Relax...oooh, now I'm invested. I eat about 6 triangles and wait. It takes about 45 minutes maybe an hour for me to start feeling the effects.
When I start to get high, I feel my body become limber, loose. Its kind of like all of the molecules in my body are electrified and vibrating. But not a bad kind of vibration, one that is gentle, stimulating and relaxing at the same time. It almost feels as if I can step out of this body, out of this life and into something entirely new. The rain that's falling outside is so calming. It feels as if I've never heard the rain before. The longer I listen, the more I hear new things. I want to just lay here. It's like I'm experiencing pure life. I stretch out, finally feeling the calm spread through me. Oh my God. A shower, while it's raining with these heightened senses, will be out of this fucking world.
I strip and turn the shower onto scald. I love hot showers. As I work the soap through my hair all of the inner turmoil and stress leaks out of me. I'm washing away everything from the day, from the week and God does it feel amazing. The water feels like it's hugging me. The warmth cloaks me, opening my pores. I inhale the warm moisture. The soap slides against my skin, coating me in an armour of bubbles. Like this, I can take on the world. I'm safe from everything. I coat my entire body in suds, scrubbing as hard as I can. My tattoos peek out from underneath the bubbles, some of them look distorted by the bubbles. It's freaky and cool at the same time. I can't believe that I have all these images and words all over my skin. What a time to be alive! Humans worked out how to do this...Jesus, this is out of this world. I need more of them. I haven't been tattooed since August. I need to book one for December, get one last one in before the end of the year. I only got like 3 this year. What the fuck. The mystery tattoo, Pooh Bear for my sweet Puffin and then the Breaking Bad bee. Shit. I need to step up my ink game. I've had so many ideas, but I've just been busy and spotty with things. That's it. I'm getting another small one before the end of the year. Next year I can finish my last bit of my right side stomach pannel. Plague doctor and grim reaper scene. Perfection.
And the world moves in slow motion. I breathe easier, my entire body is relaxed; I feel completely weightless. I inhale moonlight and exhale giggles. Stevie Nick's sexy, sultry vocals wash over me. Sounds are magnified throughout my entire body. Every cell throbs with pleasure. Guttural screams escape my soul to the beat that is consuming me. It feels like I'm moving in slow motion too and maybe I am; I can't really gauge it. I'm both magical and miserable. My skin bag feels overcrowded with emotion and sensation. I sway along with the music, wanting to just let everything loose. Am I loose? Time ceases to exist. I'm just existing. I don't even know if I'm breathing. I must be. Sounds are so much more stimulating and pleasing when high. It feels as if every song I listen to was written just for me. I feel the bass in my spine. Rocketman by Elton John comes out and I listen in surround sound. I keep it on repeat for what feels like hours.
As it is made by the same company as the Budah Bar, the design of the bar is the same. It comes in little squares each sectioned into little triangles. Now, I love this. It reminds me of being a kid and having my nan make me grilled cheese; she'd always cut them into little triangles for me. Godamn, I miss this. And shit, it's been a while since I had a grilled cheese. I should make one, one of these days. Fuck, I'm getting off-topic here.
The chocolate doesn't have the funny aftertaste like the last one; probably because it's not a white chocolate. I've said it before and I'll say it again, fuck white chocolate. The chocolate has only the faintest hint of marijuana taste; it's so smooth and the toffee has the perfect amount of crunch. It's some of the tastiest toffees I've had in a while. I wonder how long it will take to get me high. I felt like I kinda needed a bit more to feel what I wanted to when I had the Buddha, but let's take it slow, yeah? I want to enjoy the high, not reach a level of paranoia like I did the other week. Should I do a blog on that one too? The Aliens Say Relax...oooh, now I'm invested. I eat about 6 triangles and wait. It takes about 45 minutes maybe an hour for me to start feeling the effects.
When I start to get high, I feel my body become limber, loose. Its kind of like all of the molecules in my body are electrified and vibrating. But not a bad kind of vibration, one that is gentle, stimulating and relaxing at the same time. It almost feels as if I can step out of this body, out of this life and into something entirely new. The rain that's falling outside is so calming. It feels as if I've never heard the rain before. The longer I listen, the more I hear new things. I want to just lay here. It's like I'm experiencing pure life. I stretch out, finally feeling the calm spread through me. Oh my God. A shower, while it's raining with these heightened senses, will be out of this fucking world.I strip and turn the shower onto scald. I love hot showers. As I work the soap through my hair all of the inner turmoil and stress leaks out of me. I'm washing away everything from the day, from the week and God does it feel amazing. The water feels like it's hugging me. The warmth cloaks me, opening my pores. I inhale the warm moisture. The soap slides against my skin, coating me in an armour of bubbles. Like this, I can take on the world. I'm safe from everything. I coat my entire body in suds, scrubbing as hard as I can. My tattoos peek out from underneath the bubbles, some of them look distorted by the bubbles. It's freaky and cool at the same time. I can't believe that I have all these images and words all over my skin. What a time to be alive! Humans worked out how to do this...Jesus, this is out of this world. I need more of them. I haven't been tattooed since August. I need to book one for December, get one last one in before the end of the year. I only got like 3 this year. What the fuck. The mystery tattoo, Pooh Bear for my sweet Puffin and then the Breaking Bad bee. Shit. I need to step up my ink game. I've had so many ideas, but I've just been busy and spotty with things. That's it. I'm getting another small one before the end of the year. Next year I can finish my last bit of my right side stomach pannel. Plague doctor and grim reaper scene. Perfection.
And the world moves in slow motion. I breathe easier, my entire body is relaxed; I feel completely weightless. I inhale moonlight and exhale giggles. Stevie Nick's sexy, sultry vocals wash over me. Sounds are magnified throughout my entire body. Every cell throbs with pleasure. Guttural screams escape my soul to the beat that is consuming me. It feels like I'm moving in slow motion too and maybe I am; I can't really gauge it. I'm both magical and miserable. My skin bag feels overcrowded with emotion and sensation. I sway along with the music, wanting to just let everything loose. Am I loose? Time ceases to exist. I'm just existing. I don't even know if I'm breathing. I must be. Sounds are so much more stimulating and pleasing when high. It feels as if every song I listen to was written just for me. I feel the bass in my spine. Rocketman by Elton John comes out and I listen in surround sound. I keep it on repeat for what feels like hours.
The sun rising through the trees in the morning is striking. Through the branches of the trees a combination of cool pinks, oranges and yellows ascent into the palest of blues. The night is being chased away from another few hours; it will leave me with an empty longing for more. It feels as if I've never seen the light before. I feel my breath held in my chest, my anxiety waiting for me to exhale. It feels like I'm experiencing daybreak for the very first time, then all of a sudden, it feels like a kind of haunting memory. I've seen this before, but I can't place when or where. It feels like I'm a stranger in a new life.
When I'm high, I connect to my body more. I feel things so intently. My memories are vivid and I can physically feel them. My sex drive is kicked into hyperdrive and everything around me is stimulating. The cloth of my jimjam bottoms brushing against my crotch is enough to turn me on. I feel my pulse quicken, my breathing become ragged as memory and arousal overtake me. I love when this happens. I enter another plan entirely. It's as if I'm watching a film or a documentary on someone else's life. Arousal takes over me, the tension building, everything feels like it's racing inside me and when I finally orgasm pleasure washes throughout my entire body. I breathe deep and lay there against the pillows letting the serotonin, dopamine and oxytocin mix with the THC. I'm so calm...and tired. I'm kinda tired after I cum usually, but being high and cumming just takes so much more out of me. I snuggle down, deep under the duvet. Tucked in next to me is my beloved Puffin doll and Pork Chop. I feel amazing. This synthetic happiness is just what I need.
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