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Delectables with Dan: “FRAPPULA” FRAPPUCCINO!


Halloween is here! 
The vampire frappuccino is dominating the Internet and has captured my heart once again.
Sadly, it's not available everywhere or year-round. I don't know why the fuck not, I mean just think of all the Goth business Star-Fucks would bring in! So you can indulge your spooky sweet-tooth year-round I bring you the homemade Vampire Frappuccino! 

LET'S GET FRAPPING.
What You Will Need: 

1 tray of ice 
240ml cold milk
2-3 scoops of semi-hard (haha) vanilla ice cream
chocolate sauce
strawberry sauce 
240ml double cream 
4 teaspoons of sugar 
1.5 tablespoons vanilla essence 

Kitchen Gear
Blender 
Electric Hand Mixer
Medium sized Bowl
Icing Tool with large size star tip 
Large Cup/Mug
Put your ice, ice-cream and milk into your blender. Don't think about the sauces. Forget they even exist for now. Oh yeah, rush your ice before you put it into your blender. (I wasn't thinking when I did it and had to take the ice-cream out and crush the ice then put it back in. It was a fucking mess.) Blend for 2-3 minutes until mixture is thiccc and chunkay. Allow mix to settle for a moment before giving it a stir with a silver knife or a baking spoon to make sure you've gotten any large chunks out of it before you pour it into your mug.

Before pouring the mixture into your cup, drizzle the chocolate syrup into the bottom of your cup, swirling it around so that it coats the entire bottom of the cup and the lower sides. Don't swirl the chocolate and ice-cream mixture together. Just pour it in right on top of that shit. Oh, no, chocolate sauce and calling it shit- that's not appetising. Maybe I'm making this shit themed jokes in poor taste, but it's all I've got right now. 

Add 2-3 squirts of the strawberry sauce on the top of the ice-cream mixture; make sure that the sauce covers most if not all of the surface to give it that nice blood appearance; unless you're not into the strawberry that much. Sometimes, for me, strawberry and chocolate is okay, just like not in the sauces. The sauces are alright if I had to choose I'd prefer a real strawberry dipped in dark chocolate. 

 Now you're going to need to top off your frapp with some homemade vanilla whipped cream. Unless you wanted to buy that store bought shit.  In a small bowl add your double cream, sugar and vanilla essence. Using an electric blender, beat on high for 5-8 minutes until cream becomes thick and fluffy. The scream will be lightly sweet, not a sickly sweet like what you'd find in grocery stores. You can add a bit more sugar to adjust it to your taste. Using an icing tool or icing bag, pipe the top of your drink with cool whipped cream giving it a nice effect.  Or if you're lazy, just ladle it in with a large spoon. 

Add two small drizzles of strawberry syrup into the whipped cream giving it the appearance of fang marks. Let it dribble down the side of your cup a bit, wiping up any extra because sometimes this strawberry shit stains. Hm, interesting. Strawberry shit stains. An interesting and semi-troubling concept also has the potential for untold humour in a prank setting. 
And there it is. Next month sometime I think I will do a make a mocha frapp special, but I'm not sure so don't hold me to that. Also, there will be a few more meal like things on Delectables with Dan in the coming months. I just want to spread it out a bit more and it will be easier for me to budget all this stuff.
And always, if you have suggestions do leave comments!
I don't know why I even bother to put this down because I rarely get any responses. I think this will be the last time I ask for suggestions because I'm tired of the disappointments. If you do want to engage then do! Anyway, until next time.




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