What's In A Name? Part Two
I sent out the papers knowing that it would take them a little bit of time to go through them and get back to me with the next step or tell me that there are problems that I need to fix. I had my lawyer look over it before I sent it out and he said it looked good. Now, I have this cool little postal service thing that lets me get a preview of the post that's going to come in that day; it's just a little photo of each piece of mail, not the contents of what's inside the envelope. Handy little service. Not always. One week after submitting the papers to the court, well not even, it was 6 days, later I see a letter from the courthouse. My heart sinks. A reply this fast? There's probably an issue. They probably rejected it. There's gotta be something wrong. It can't be good news. Anxiety starts burning holes in my stomach. Who the fuck ever got good news this quickly?
I can't read what the letter says until it arrives in the late afternoon, early afternoon. My anxiety is through the roof. I just stare at my phone screen knowing that there is a letter deciding the course of my life coming in the post. I need to find something else to focus on or I will fall apart. They can't deny me! I don't know what I'm going to do if they do. I'll have to ask my lawyer and find out what's going on. Surely he'd know.
What if he says there's nothing we can do? Or that I have to wait for months in order to be able to try again? I want to lay down and cry. This is not something that I needed right now. It was difficult to come out and get up the courage to change my name legally and now I may have to semi start the process all over again?
I head to the cinema to take my mind off things and boy does it. I'm usually a horror guy but seeing Midsommer really messed with me. It awakened fears that I didn't know I had. It was a great distraction though; it got my mind of the letter for a little while.
My hands were shaking as I went home. It was time to read the letter and find out what it had to say. I carefully opened the envelope and see the word hearing. My mind spins. I don't know what that means. I want to know, I need to know, but I'm also afraid to know. No, Daniel. You can do this. Open it.
I open it. It tells me the next steps that I have to take. The publication steps are vague, but there is some other paperwork that I need to fill out and documents that I need to submit with the finished papers. I'm informed that there is a deadline for anyone to object to my name change and if that should occur then I need to attend a hearing. Why the fuck would anyone object? Well, besides my mum and sister, everyone else has been so loving and supportive of me. I tell Puffs, Jake and Winkles, right away. I don't know what to think. My words are caught in my throat. My brain is fuzzy in the best possible way. Something is finally going my way.
A few things aren't clear so I reach out to my lawyer to find out what I need to do. I also contact the local paper mentioned in the documents that is supposed to publish my petition to change my name. I'm proud of myself. I didn't let my anxiety get in the way of my life like I've always done in the past. I'm moving forward in a healthy way.
SUBMIT
The next thing that I have to do is submit the citation from the court to the paper for publication. I mentioned my thoughts on this earlier, so I'm a little nervous about having to contact someone from the paper. I'm told that I need to fax everything into the paper. Fax? I don't have a fax machine. I could drop off copies to the paper or easier yet, scan them into my laptop and email them in. Then I realise that my scanner isn't working. I take photos and submit them into the woman in charge of this sort of publication with a note to let me know if there are any issues with what I've submitted so I can get back to her ASAP. For those of you who don't know, there are publication date deadlines to have your citation published in a local paper and to send a copy of it into the courthouse. A few hours later I get a reply from her saying that I need to turn the jpeg files into a PDF for her. What she can't do that? Isn't that a part of her job? I convert the files and resubmit them to her.
I don't hear back from her for a week or so, so I'm assuming that everything is going to plan, but I can't ignore the nagging in the back of my mind. I reach out to her asking when I should expect to see the publication. And what do I get back? She tells me that she needs a PDF of a different document that they sent me and I go into orbit. She's been sitting on her ass for a week not letting me know this?! Does she not realise that these things are on a deadline?! If I hadn't asked her about the status, would she have reached out to me or would this stupid bitch fuck me over? Another cunt who can't do her job. My blood pressure spikes in rage. I need to calm myself down so I can go through the papers, find the other one that she needs and do what I have to do.
A few days later she emails me back, thanking me for the correct document and lets me know that the citation is set to run in the local paper in a few days. My heart flutters. I'll see it in print. I can't wait. I mark the day on my calendar and anxiously wait for the day. When the day comes, I can hardly contain myself. It's a good thing that I took an extra shift at work to distract me from things until thee paper comes in the late afternoon. The clock strikes midday and I tear out of the building wanting nothing more to get home and wait for the paperboy to arrive.
After I hear him drive off I race to the post box and yank the paper off the little hook. I'm careful not to damage the paper as I pull the plastic bag off. I see the citation in print. I want to scream with joy. Another hurdle passed. Now I just have to make a copy of this and send this back in with the paper that the court wants.
I fill out the return paperwork, carefully tuck the clipping into the envelope and drop it into the post. The final leg of the journey completed. Now all I have to do is wait and see if they approve it or if they need me to appear for an in-person hearing. I really am hoping that I don't have to go to a hearing. It will be a mixture of shame and public speaking; my anxiety would be through the roof. The shame of it being denied and then me having to go to a group of strangers and explain my reasons for wanting to change my name. I don't know how long it will take to find out what the verdict is. When I spoke to my lawyer he said the entire process would take 4-6 weeks. It's been about a month so far. I wish it was a speedier process, more clearly written out and just an easier ordeal to deal with. Maybe it will be like that in the future for those like me and for others as well.
LE WAIT
I've been checking the post for a week now and still nothing. I waited a bit after sending it in before starting to check. Maybe I did something wrong? It feels like it's taking longer than usual. I'm not a criminal, so my background check came back clean. I'm not hiding from anyone or any companies. With each passing day, my unrest grows. 2 weeks go by after submitting it. Slowly, it turns into 3 weeks. Time is becoming nothing but a blur. Surely if there was an issue they would have rang me? Maybe not. Maybe it's been lost in the post. My panic is near overwhelming when I see a letter from the courthouse in the mail preview that I have. It's a standard envelope. All the worst possibilities flood me. I want to lay down and cry. I was so stupid to think that it would be this easy. Most things are never easy for me.
Thankfully, I have work to distract me until the post comes. I'm not ready to open this courthouse letter either. This one is more pressing than the first one. I carefully open it. I've been approved! The judge signed off and I am legally Daniel Francis now. I breathe a sigh of relief. I should get a small cake to celebrate this small victory. It's both huge and small at the same time. I'm almost bursting with joy as I tell all of my mates about the good news. All of them are happy for me. It's a great feeling. I make copies to bring into my boss and begin to map out all the things that I'll need to change. They don't change your other legal documents for you. You have to do it for every single thing. I need to change the name on my ID number, update my passports and my ID cards, then my bank account and credit cards. There's so much to do it feels overwhelming. All I can do is take it one step at a time.
I can't read what the letter says until it arrives in the late afternoon, early afternoon. My anxiety is through the roof. I just stare at my phone screen knowing that there is a letter deciding the course of my life coming in the post. I need to find something else to focus on or I will fall apart. They can't deny me! I don't know what I'm going to do if they do. I'll have to ask my lawyer and find out what's going on. Surely he'd know.
What if he says there's nothing we can do? Or that I have to wait for months in order to be able to try again? I want to lay down and cry. This is not something that I needed right now. It was difficult to come out and get up the courage to change my name legally and now I may have to semi start the process all over again?
I head to the cinema to take my mind off things and boy does it. I'm usually a horror guy but seeing Midsommer really messed with me. It awakened fears that I didn't know I had. It was a great distraction though; it got my mind of the letter for a little while.
My hands were shaking as I went home. It was time to read the letter and find out what it had to say. I carefully opened the envelope and see the word hearing. My mind spins. I don't know what that means. I want to know, I need to know, but I'm also afraid to know. No, Daniel. You can do this. Open it.
I open it. It tells me the next steps that I have to take. The publication steps are vague, but there is some other paperwork that I need to fill out and documents that I need to submit with the finished papers. I'm informed that there is a deadline for anyone to object to my name change and if that should occur then I need to attend a hearing. Why the fuck would anyone object? Well, besides my mum and sister, everyone else has been so loving and supportive of me. I tell Puffs, Jake and Winkles, right away. I don't know what to think. My words are caught in my throat. My brain is fuzzy in the best possible way. Something is finally going my way.
A few things aren't clear so I reach out to my lawyer to find out what I need to do. I also contact the local paper mentioned in the documents that is supposed to publish my petition to change my name. I'm proud of myself. I didn't let my anxiety get in the way of my life like I've always done in the past. I'm moving forward in a healthy way.
SUBMIT
The next thing that I have to do is submit the citation from the court to the paper for publication. I mentioned my thoughts on this earlier, so I'm a little nervous about having to contact someone from the paper. I'm told that I need to fax everything into the paper. Fax? I don't have a fax machine. I could drop off copies to the paper or easier yet, scan them into my laptop and email them in. Then I realise that my scanner isn't working. I take photos and submit them into the woman in charge of this sort of publication with a note to let me know if there are any issues with what I've submitted so I can get back to her ASAP. For those of you who don't know, there are publication date deadlines to have your citation published in a local paper and to send a copy of it into the courthouse. A few hours later I get a reply from her saying that I need to turn the jpeg files into a PDF for her. What she can't do that? Isn't that a part of her job? I convert the files and resubmit them to her.
I don't hear back from her for a week or so, so I'm assuming that everything is going to plan, but I can't ignore the nagging in the back of my mind. I reach out to her asking when I should expect to see the publication. And what do I get back? She tells me that she needs a PDF of a different document that they sent me and I go into orbit. She's been sitting on her ass for a week not letting me know this?! Does she not realise that these things are on a deadline?! If I hadn't asked her about the status, would she have reached out to me or would this stupid bitch fuck me over? Another cunt who can't do her job. My blood pressure spikes in rage. I need to calm myself down so I can go through the papers, find the other one that she needs and do what I have to do.
A few days later she emails me back, thanking me for the correct document and lets me know that the citation is set to run in the local paper in a few days. My heart flutters. I'll see it in print. I can't wait. I mark the day on my calendar and anxiously wait for the day. When the day comes, I can hardly contain myself. It's a good thing that I took an extra shift at work to distract me from things until thee paper comes in the late afternoon. The clock strikes midday and I tear out of the building wanting nothing more to get home and wait for the paperboy to arrive.
After I hear him drive off I race to the post box and yank the paper off the little hook. I'm careful not to damage the paper as I pull the plastic bag off. I see the citation in print. I want to scream with joy. Another hurdle passed. Now I just have to make a copy of this and send this back in with the paper that the court wants.
I fill out the return paperwork, carefully tuck the clipping into the envelope and drop it into the post. The final leg of the journey completed. Now all I have to do is wait and see if they approve it or if they need me to appear for an in-person hearing. I really am hoping that I don't have to go to a hearing. It will be a mixture of shame and public speaking; my anxiety would be through the roof. The shame of it being denied and then me having to go to a group of strangers and explain my reasons for wanting to change my name. I don't know how long it will take to find out what the verdict is. When I spoke to my lawyer he said the entire process would take 4-6 weeks. It's been about a month so far. I wish it was a speedier process, more clearly written out and just an easier ordeal to deal with. Maybe it will be like that in the future for those like me and for others as well.
LE WAIT
I've been checking the post for a week now and still nothing. I waited a bit after sending it in before starting to check. Maybe I did something wrong? It feels like it's taking longer than usual. I'm not a criminal, so my background check came back clean. I'm not hiding from anyone or any companies. With each passing day, my unrest grows. 2 weeks go by after submitting it. Slowly, it turns into 3 weeks. Time is becoming nothing but a blur. Surely if there was an issue they would have rang me? Maybe not. Maybe it's been lost in the post. My panic is near overwhelming when I see a letter from the courthouse in the mail preview that I have. It's a standard envelope. All the worst possibilities flood me. I want to lay down and cry. I was so stupid to think that it would be this easy. Most things are never easy for me.
Thankfully, I have work to distract me until the post comes. I'm not ready to open this courthouse letter either. This one is more pressing than the first one. I carefully open it. I've been approved! The judge signed off and I am legally Daniel Francis now. I breathe a sigh of relief. I should get a small cake to celebrate this small victory. It's both huge and small at the same time. I'm almost bursting with joy as I tell all of my mates about the good news. All of them are happy for me. It's a great feeling. I make copies to bring into my boss and begin to map out all the things that I'll need to change. They don't change your other legal documents for you. You have to do it for every single thing. I need to change the name on my ID number, update my passports and my ID cards, then my bank account and credit cards. There's so much to do it feels overwhelming. All I can do is take it one step at a time.
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