Restless // Under My Skin
It’s raining and I want nothing more than to run through the raindrops and have him catch me in his arms. Embrace one another like the animals that we are…I need to taste him in my tonsils and in my groyne. I need to know him in every way possible. I want him to chew on me, taste me and know my sin and with open arms, I’ll embrace his. I want the rain to pelt us as we melt into one being. Connecting in new and thrilling ways that will shake the world.
I want him to pull my hair and bite my bottom lip, sucking my lip rings as he pulls away. I want to sink my teeth into his chub laden hip. I want to embrace him, feeling not only the physical body but the soul that I so deeply crave. I want to breathe in his wonderment and become further intoxicated on his scent. I want him to consume me, play with me and make me his. I want this to become ritual. Embrace the depressive chaos that threatens us, tempt the waters of fate. Take the ugly and turn it into something beautiful, and only in his light could such a thing ever could be made. I want the sweat to drip down our arched backs and the reality of our emptiness shatters around us.
Throw me into the wall and love me fast and hard, like I’ve never known pain before. I’m clawing at my skin, salivating. I need you so bad. My hips ache for your soft, subtle hips and the comforting tone of your voice.
I’m screaming his name out into the rain as the tears that fill the night sky cascade down on me. they arouse the very essence of what it means to be human. He’s pulling at my centre of gravity once again and he’s the only one I can see. I’m exhaling all the sexual tension caught in me as my ragged breath make love to the chilled, wet air. I’m alight with the truth of life and the realisation that I’d do anything to have him by my side. My tempted fingers scratch at my mortal form, wanting to experience only the divine. My screams for him each through the darkness of these London streets and I’m left to make sense of this perverse attraction.
....
My fingers dance against his ivory skin as if I were playing a hypnotic melody on a baby grand. He’s soft and subtle. He’s strong and warm beneath my fingertips; his back occasionally arching at the electricity of my touch. I love the peach pinks his skin becomes when he’s drowning in the sea of my arousal. His soft moans are a melody all of their own. I love it when he knocks me off my feet and tastes the darkness of my soul.
This is no human hunger. I’m ready to be punished. I’m ready to be taught how to behave. I’m putty in the hands of my chubby lover. He’s the only thing that helps me to fight this misery. My vision fades with ecstasy as his hands find their way down my sternum and dance around my navel. Nothing is better than the seduction of his lips.
I’m a slave to these desires and I’m not sure thatI ever want to be free of their restraints. This torrent pain is the centre of my pleasure. It seems so easy for others to suppress these urges and I'm amazed at their self-restraint when it comes to matters such as these. My feelings for him make me restless. And they make me afraid of the future like I've never been before. I'm tormented by the prospect of a life without him and the possibility that all I'll be left with is shards of memory.
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