Perpetual Chaos
Greetings and Salutations on this lovely summer day.
Mid-June already. Time sure is slipping by me...just like that guy down the escalator today. I don't like them to be honest. The sharp little teeth on the edges, the moving steps, the way it tries to rip your shoes off at the end of the ride. I'd rather walk down the steps and keep these £150 trainers looking good, thank you very much. But that's not what I wanted to talk to you guys about.
I had an interesting thought as I cracked open my breakfast (a coke zero, not a beer, I'm not that far gone...yet.) and it really left me pondering some of my life choices and decisions. Sometimes I really wonder if I'm alive, that this is happening in real time and I'm not just watching it back, feeling it like some kind of virtual reality television show or something. Sometimes I wonder if I'm dead and I'm just watching my life back in the slowest fucking way imaginable. But if I am, how don't I know what's coming next? Has the act of death erased everything from my consciousness? Please God, no. Is this just me? Is this even physically possible? Does physics allow this?
What is time anyway? Is there really any clear way to define it other than passages of existence broken into individual blocks labelled by differently by everyone who experiences it? Its a record keeping system, that's all it is! Do we really need and or want to keep records of shit that's happened to us? The good, the bad, the horribly scarring? It all seems just like another thing forced upon our shoulders as soon as we draw our first breath in this plane of existence. Maybe it has more meaning than what it's defined as.
"Time is the indefinite continued progress of existence and events that occur in apparently irreversible succession from the past through the present to the future."
Is the past even real? Is the future real? Maybe these are just ideas to distract us from what's in the here and now. Sometimes when I think about this shit, it feels like my brain is going to implode and my heart does these little flutters. Perhaps humans should just leave this shit alone and quit fucking with something they have no right to be fucking with. And anyway, who decided what the measurement system is? Man. That's who! It's all just a self-sustaining bullshit story. Let's circle back to what I was saying before, that it's pressed upon us. It really is. It's just another way to limit and define things that are beyond the normal understandings of our surroundings and evades the human understanding like a kid with a peanut allergy avoids the canteen in the school. Time. Another thing we really don't need. It pulls us in every which way, adding burdens and stressing the cardiovascular system and the human emotional spectrum. People back in the stone age didn't have some of the stress related health issues we have today. You know why? Didn't understand time! Didn't have any concept. Didn't give a shit. Sorry Darwin, but evolution really screwed the pooch on this one. Higher reasoning, yeah but at what cost?
So I lay in my bed at night these thoughts weighing down on me and I wonder if there's any meaning other than the meaning that I assign to it? Probably not. I'm beginning to realise that everything in life is completely subjective. I've always known there are no other absolute truths except death and rates of growth and decay and illness. (I didn't include taxes because there's many millionaires in America in prison for tax evasion.) I sometimes wonder if my head is gonna explode someday. How many thoughts, ideas, memories/ experiences and other information can the human mind hold? Is there a limit or is it really limitless? But there are different types of human memory based on the senses that collect the information and they're stored differently based on the sense that acquired it. (I think, not really sure on that.) Byt them there's different parts of sensory memory, long-term, short-term, and then under that even more different types, implicit long-term etc.
Theoretically, it's believed that there is no limit to the human memory, but have they ever really tested this theory? There's talk that there is a physical limitation to the amount that the human brain can store, but no one knows for sure. Actually, now that I think about it, there can't really be a way to test this theory as we have no way of knowing the size of each memory, everything is obviously measured in different units. How can we even begin to define the units for measuring memory of the human mind?
Maybe if I did more than just waffle about these things on this blog and to stoned teenagers on the internet, I may actually work some of these things out. I might just write a paper or two. Maybe win a prize. Do they give out prizes and awards for papers on existentialism, philosophy and social constructs? I lack motivation and credentials to be taken seriously. But on the other hand, who goes to university to study philosophy and gets to use the degree to earn a living? I've gotta get off this topic before my thoughts start to leak through my ears or I have a nervous breakdown pondering the un-ponderable.
>>>>>>
I have some big news that I'm looking to announce at the end of the week. Some of you might already have some ideas about what it is. It's something I've hidden and concealed for the longest time, but for me, for my mental health and also for my relationships, I need to be more open about this part of my life. It's going to be a real "adventure" so to speak with tonnes of highs and lows. I'll experience heartbreak and devastation in ways I've never known before, but I believe they'll be worth it in order for me to be free, to live.
And for the record green tea with a hint of lemon and a few fresh raspberries is amazing.
The Grumpy Philosopher At Work.
LINKS
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/anjathesickboy/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/darkdreamingdan
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/darkdr
Tumblr: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/darklydreamingdanie
What is time anyway? Is there really any clear way to define it other than passages of existence broken into individual blocks labelled by differently by everyone who experiences it? Its a record keeping system, that's all it is! Do we really need and or want to keep records of shit that's happened to us? The good, the bad, the horribly scarring? It all seems just like another thing forced upon our shoulders as soon as we draw our first breath in this plane of existence. Maybe it has more meaning than what it's defined as.
"Time is the indefinite continued progress of existence and events that occur in apparently irreversible succession from the past through the present to the future."
Is the past even real? Is the future real? Maybe these are just ideas to distract us from what's in the here and now. Sometimes when I think about this shit, it feels like my brain is going to implode and my heart does these little flutters. Perhaps humans should just leave this shit alone and quit fucking with something they have no right to be fucking with. And anyway, who decided what the measurement system is? Man. That's who! It's all just a self-sustaining bullshit story. Let's circle back to what I was saying before, that it's pressed upon us. It really is. It's just another way to limit and define things that are beyond the normal understandings of our surroundings and evades the human understanding like a kid with a peanut allergy avoids the canteen in the school. Time. Another thing we really don't need. It pulls us in every which way, adding burdens and stressing the cardiovascular system and the human emotional spectrum. People back in the stone age didn't have some of the stress related health issues we have today. You know why? Didn't understand time! Didn't have any concept. Didn't give a shit. Sorry Darwin, but evolution really screwed the pooch on this one. Higher reasoning, yeah but at what cost?
So I lay in my bed at night these thoughts weighing down on me and I wonder if there's any meaning other than the meaning that I assign to it? Probably not. I'm beginning to realise that everything in life is completely subjective. I've always known there are no other absolute truths except death and rates of growth and decay and illness. (I didn't include taxes because there's many millionaires in America in prison for tax evasion.) I sometimes wonder if my head is gonna explode someday. How many thoughts, ideas, memories/ experiences and other information can the human mind hold? Is there a limit or is it really limitless? But there are different types of human memory based on the senses that collect the information and they're stored differently based on the sense that acquired it. (I think, not really sure on that.) Byt them there's different parts of sensory memory, long-term, short-term, and then under that even more different types, implicit long-term etc.
Theoretically, it's believed that there is no limit to the human memory, but have they ever really tested this theory? There's talk that there is a physical limitation to the amount that the human brain can store, but no one knows for sure. Actually, now that I think about it, there can't really be a way to test this theory as we have no way of knowing the size of each memory, everything is obviously measured in different units. How can we even begin to define the units for measuring memory of the human mind?
Maybe if I did more than just waffle about these things on this blog and to stoned teenagers on the internet, I may actually work some of these things out. I might just write a paper or two. Maybe win a prize. Do they give out prizes and awards for papers on existentialism, philosophy and social constructs? I lack motivation and credentials to be taken seriously. But on the other hand, who goes to university to study philosophy and gets to use the degree to earn a living? I've gotta get off this topic before my thoughts start to leak through my ears or I have a nervous breakdown pondering the un-ponderable.
>>>>>>
I have some big news that I'm looking to announce at the end of the week. Some of you might already have some ideas about what it is. It's something I've hidden and concealed for the longest time, but for me, for my mental health and also for my relationships, I need to be more open about this part of my life. It's going to be a real "adventure" so to speak with tonnes of highs and lows. I'll experience heartbreak and devastation in ways I've never known before, but I believe they'll be worth it in order for me to be free, to live.
And for the record green tea with a hint of lemon and a few fresh raspberries is amazing.
The Grumpy Philosopher At Work.
LINKS
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/anjathesickboy/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/darkdreamingdan
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/darkdr
Tumblr: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/darklydreamingdanie
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